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Reunion time! You know what that means, right? We get to see these bitches out yell and out ghetto each other while Shaunie pretends that it has nothing to do with her. The stage is set; the “ladies” are ready to answer the “tough” questions posed by John Salley. And the first thing I notice is RealWorldTami looking like a hot tranny mess.
For real RealWorldTami?
She was making such great strides with her appearance this season, and now… Oh, RealWorldTami. I want to be on your side even when I don’t condone your behavior. Why do you do this to me?
Who am I kidding? We have a love that will never die and besides, I LOVE TRANNIES!
Just a word of warning Gasmii: I am going to refer to our host as Salley because he so obviously wants to be one of the cool girls in the circle that he lets them get away with all kinds of shit tonight.
So, Salley welcomes everyone and then asks about TinyDancerRoyce’s behavior at last year’s reunion. TinyDancerRoyce says she saw how badly they talked about her on the show and wasn’t going to put up with it at the reunion. She gets in a dig about their time being up and her time being now. She does hold her own pretty well throughout this reunion, even when Jen and Evelyn play their middle school games of “did you hear anyone talking?”
Then it’s Evelyn and TinyDancerRoyce’s turn. We get the flashback of TinyDancerRoyce saying what she feels about Evelyn and Evelyn being stank in return. They show Evelyn throwing the drink and Salley really gets intense in the interview and calls Evelyn out on throwing the glass and really digs to find out what the problem is on Evelyn’s side.
I’m kidding!
He totally wants to be on the cool girls’ side. So, he kind of sidesteps the whole thing and TinyDancerRoyce says that people who “throw glasses can’t throw hands.” Which kind of made me love her. Not as much as I love RealWorldTami, but it’s love nonetheless.
They get into the Evelyn and RealWorldTami feud from last season and earlier this season. And MessyMeeka jumps in with the comment that “you sued her…” And Salley doesn’t even acknowledge that she said anything. Salley wants to be on the cool kids side so bad that he makes MessyMeeka look impartial.
He just about pees his pants when Evelyn presents him with a couple of those ugly ass t-shirts for him and his wife. RealWorldTami explains that she wasn’t actually suing, she was basically stating her intent if they couldn’t come to an agreement. And they are all cool now.
If I get my wife to sport this ugly shirt, can I be in the Circle?
They jump into the break up of Jennifer and Eric the Troll. And even though I don’t like Jennifer or her nasty attitude, I do think that break up was for the best. If only for the fact that those two would have the ugliest, dumbest and most entitled children ever!
Seriously. Ugliest Children EVAH!
And, no one wants that on their conscience.
Shaunie and Evelyn weren’t sure how long it would take for Jennifer to file, but they knew she would do it eventually. I only mention it because it’s really the only contribution to the discussion that Shaunie makes all evening.
They jump into the divorce party. Salley asks why the party before the divorce. She says that Eric was and is dragging his feet and she was going to do what she was going to do and basically fuck Eric.
I stop and consider Eric and Jennfer for a minute. Here is this guy who was so ugly that his mom probably kept his head wrapped in gauze for most of his life. He plays basketball and makes some money and suddenly all of these women are willing to look past his misshapen head and face. Then, he gets married to an entitled bitch who thinks she is classier than she actually is. Jennifer probably spent a great deal of time trying to change him and he probably spent a great deal of time only feeling adequate when he was buying her jewelry and businesses. So, of course, he is going to take advantage of the groupies that are so willing to close their eyes and take one for the team in order to get a payday. Then, Jennifer starts doing this trashy show where she gets validated by her ho of a friend, Evelyn. She really starts to think that her shit doesn't stink and that everyone will be on her side because of her position in "the circle." Is it any wonder their marriage barely lasted 4 years? I know people who were in high school longer than they were married.
So, they go to the escalation of Jennifer’s break up – and they show Jen making out with the paid escort. Then they show the splash seen round the Twitterverse. Salley asks for reactions. He is totally on Jennifer’s side and says something about how if it had been one of his daughters, they would have had to call him to come handle that mess.
RealWorldTami agrees with me that Eric tossing the drink was a bitch move, but she is looking at it from the wrong perspective. She thinks that it’s because he is a man and she is a woman. I think that it’s because of the actual circumstances of his using premeditation and personal space violation. But, none of them admit the truth: that shit was the only entertaining thing in the episode.
Jennifer says that she is dating someone now and TinyDancerRoyce asks if she is sleeping with him. She says this because of the shit that Evelyn and Jennifer said about TinyDancerRoyce must be sleeping with every guy she dates. Jennifer, having no response, pretends she doesn’t hear anyone talking. She and Evelyn use that ploy throughout the reunion and it’s the most annoying thing ever. On the annoyance scale, I would say it’s somewhere between Evelyn’s use of the phrase “I seen” and SillyPutty’s face.
This face is probably the most annoying thing on TV
Salley says nothing about this behavior because he can feel that he is almost a part of the circle. All he has to do is let Jennifer and Evelyn say whatever they want without question. Honestly, you guys, I can’t hold it against him. I find myself giving RealWorldTami a pass as much as I possibly can because she has been the savior of this boring ass show for me.
Anyway, Salley says that they invited Eric to appear and we can find out if he actually showed after the commercial. I’ll spare you the speculation; he didn’t show.
So now they jump to SillyPutty and how she made her way back into the circle. They show the clips of her groveling to Evelyn and nudging TinyDancerRoyce towards the direction of the oncoming bus. SillyPutty says that she is glad to be back in the circle because she hates drama(?) and she loves them all. She says that she even cares about MessyMeeka and advises her to drop her lawsuit against RealWorldTami. She also says that MessyMeeka runs her mouth too much. Ok, she is right that MessyMeeka talks too much, and it probably feels great for her to be able to say that to and about someone else, but come on SillyPutty. You love drama – it's why you stir shit and can't wait to tell everyone's business. No shame in it. Just own it so that we can like you. Not saying it will be any easier to look at your face, but at least I could respect you.
SillyPutty says that MessyMeeka does things to get attention from the media (like hire a camera crew to check for her outside the club) and Evelyn calls her thirsty for relevance. Salley asks MessyMeeka if she hires her own paparazzi. MessyMeeka says that doesn’t, she just has a PR person who may or may not tell the media where she is. MessyMeeka says that the paparazzi even asked her about RealWorldTami. And, RealWorldTami exemplifies why I love her so much, despite the wig, when she asks what MessyMeeka said and does this:
Oh RealWorldTami, I just can't quit you!
There are jokes about another lawsuit. Then, Salley asks what Evelyn meant by thirsty. And Evelyn talks about all of the things that MessyMeeka did to get on the show. Apparently, MessyMeeka campaigned heavily trying to get on the show. Even going so far as to get the same types of stylists the other women used and everything. I knew she studied the last season so she would know what team she wanted to be on just from watching her behavior. But the other stuff about stylists? That info could have only come from Shaunie. Shaunie, of course, says NOTHING throughout that entire back and forth.
I'm thoughtful and above all of the drama. Especially since I know Evelyn will do my dirt for me.
I keep waiting for MessyMeeka to call Shaunie out for throwing her to the hyenas like this, but she doesn’t. I think MessyMeeka may actually WANT to do another season of this show. I think she actually liked the attention enough that she would be willing to put up with another round of shit slinging just to be famous. Or, maybe she thinks she can redeem her messy behavior and then make a gracious exit? Who knows, but my money is on her saying yes if they ask her back.
Suddenly there is a discussion about earrings. MessyMeeka says that her earrings were custom made and she even brought her own earring maker.
Chile Please.
You can by those things for 8 dollars at a mall kiosk or 2 for 5 on the street corner. Anyway, Evelyn cusses out the earring maker who is wearing a pair of earrings that look suspiciously like some that Evelyn and Shaunie wore last season. I wonder how much she charges, because I can buy some wire and beads from the craft store and make a fortune.
Yeah, I bought these at the bodega on 5th for $3.99. I still sold them as "custom" bitches!
Hell, I could pull the hubcaps off my car, loop some string around them, and sell them to these bitches for top dollar. Since I only have 4 hubcaps, they would have to be limited edition, but I’m sure they would eat that shit up, especially Jennifer.
That's it! I am totally going to start my own joorey line. It will start with the earrings and before you know it I will have moved on to necklaces. What? Like you haven't considered it yourself.
Evelyn goes so far as to call security on the earring maker. She then goes back to saying that MessyMeeka came on the show trying so hard to be down with them that she couldn’t even be herself. MessyMeeka gets on a high horse about how being a real basketball wife is about a lifestyle and is nothing like these women portray. She goes on to say that no one would want to be in their circle (while Salley vehemently disagrees). The only problem is that she DID try very hard to be in the circle and Evelyn points out that, “bitch you ain’t in the circle.” That Evelyn…She is just all class isn’t she?
It is at this point that my husband asked why I like RealWorldTami so much when I despise Evelyn. I turned it around on him by pointing out that he was not only watching the Basketball Wives reunion, he was showing enough interest to ask questions about the specific characters. He got up and went to watch television in the other room.
But, I will answer his question. RealWorldTami has never tried to pretend to be anything other than what she is. And that is a hood rat, who can speak properly upon occasion, but has no problems snatching a bitch if need be. Evelyn is a skanky ho who likes to pretend that she is classy, while also believing her own hype and looking down on others. There is no competition between the two. Also, RealWorldTami doesn't seem to take herself nearly as seriously as these other chicks do (with the possible exception of Royce).
Anyway, they jump back into the show and discuss Evelyn’s stank ass treatment of her father. Refusing to stand up when he tries to hug her, blaming him for her ho-ish ways, making him get down on his knees to beg her forgiveness, you know, the usual. They completely gloss over RealWorldTami being ousted as the manager of her MINOR children and how that could possibly work without RealWorldTami’s prior approval.
Instead, RealWorldTami makes light of the fact that she is still fired by her daughters and they are doing well but no longer a part of a group and have to start over as solo artists.
As far as Evelyn and her father, Salley kisses up to her by calling it touching and asks how their relationship is going. Oh, Salley… Don’t be so thirsty! You don’t have to suck up to Evelyn to be part of the circle. All you have to do is keep pretending that Shaunie is above all of the nasty behavior of the other women and you’re in.
I don't have to say anything. I told you that. I'm above it all.
TinyDancerRoyce channels my inner boredom with this entire storyline by giving this look as Evelyn continues to talk and try to gain our sympathy.
When is this bitch going to stop talking?
Don’t get me wrong you guys. I could see where Evelyn might be fun to hang out with, but come on. That bitch would get on my nerves if I had to actually be her friend. She is just too damn stuck up her own ass to actually be a real friend to anyone. I also think it’s laughable that ANYONE out there would look at Evelyn and her father’s storyline as an example of reaching out to heal a family breach. If there actually ARE people who did this, and they weren’t just saying that to blow more smoke up Evelyn’s ass, then I feel sorry for them. What kind of role models did those poor people have growing up?
So now it’s time to discuss MessyMeeka and her joining of the cast. We see all of her double talk and her trying to be besties with the circle. Salley asks RealWorldTami whether or not MessyMeeka put her foot in her mouth. RealWorldTami breaks it down exactly the way I have been saying it all season.
MessyMeeka came on the show with a plan to be in the circle and figured that since RealWorldTami and Evelyn had issues and TinyDancerRoyce and Jennifer had issues, her best bet was to come in talking shit about the both of them to the circle while pretending to still be cool with them . And you can see MessyMeeka thinking, “And I would have succeeded too, if it weren’t for that meddling hoodrat.”
I would have gotten away with it too, if weren't for RealWorldTami.
MessyMeeka tries to deny it but doesn’t really have a leg to stand on. So, she goes onto do the double speak thing again. MessyMeeka hangs herself with this next line. She says that when you ask someone a question 30 times then things get twisted because of the annoyance of having to answer over and over again. RealWorldTami cuts her off by saying that the answer is the answer and if it’s the truth it doesn’t change. She says that you could ask her 20 thousand times if she likes MessyMeeka and the answer will still be no. MessyMeeka sees her point but refuses to give in. Instead she pulls a Shaunie and pretends to be above it all.
Now we get to the meat of the season. RealWorldTami and MessyMeeka’s conflicts are examined. We see RealWorldTami warning about a hand in the face getting you popped. They show MessyMeeka showing her ass at the Polo event (FUCKING POLO? I still don’t get what these bitches were doing at a polo match). They show the fight. They show MessyMeeka talking about how RealWorldTami is a classless chick and bum bitch. The audience is all oohing and ahing, but RealWorldTami is not fazed by anything MessyMeeka throws at her. As a matter of fact RealWorldTami is lapping that shit up because she knows she had MessyMeeka’s number from the jump. Plus, Salley loves her AND he wants to be in the Circle, so MessyMeeka isn’t winning this reunion.
She says that she gave MessyMeeka plenty of opportunities to say what she needed to say and when MessyMeeka just kept telling lies and talking in circles to avoid telling the truth, it was a problem for her.
MessyMeeka disagrees and asks for proof of the many occasions in which she supposedly lied. She accuses RealWorldTami of bullying her – and I am so sick of that word! I would like to thank Jill Zarin and Kelly Beensomeone for officially desensitizing me to the very real problem of bullying.
RealWorldTami calls MessyMeeka “MLC” Meeka Liar Claxton. MessyMeeka gets in her own shot about “THR” Tami Hoodrat Roman. The reason it doesn’t stick is because RealWorldTami owns her hoodrat behavior. You can’t put someone down by calling them a hoodrat when they accept that they are a hoodrat. Evelyn says that Tami could have t-shirts that say MLC, but I think Tami would do better branding herself with merchandise that says Tami Hoodrat Roman, because I would totally shop at "Tamis, Bitch!" for a THR doll with multiple weave swatches.
RealWorldTami says that MessyMeeka came on the show trying to fuck with her so that she could have some relevance. She also says that she doesn’t care what MessyMeeka has to say about her because at the end of the day she is a real bitch.
You tell her RealWorldTami!
I TOLD you that shit would get you popped.
I know it’s wrong. I know I should be appalled by RealWorldTami’s behavior. But, maybe I’m just thirsty. Thirsty for some DRAMAZ! And she was the only one to deliver it all season.
Salley breaks the tension by saying he saw RealWorldTami almost say “Non muthafuckin factor.” It works, and RealWorldTami says “you’re trying to get me riled” with this huge grin and sparkling eyes. Then the reunion ends.
We get a sneak peek at the second part of the reunion and it looks like SillyPutty and MessyMeeka get into it and TinyDancerRoyce and Jennifer get into it. I’m pulling for TinyDancerRoyce on that one because Jennifer and Evelyn have been behaving like total Fuckwads to her all season long.
What about you guys? Were you disappointed in the first part? Do you think MessyMeeka held her own? Did you find RealWorldTami entertaining or ridiculous? Do you think I am a thirsty bitch because I just can’t quit my RealWorldTami love? Let me know, I can take it. >
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