BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
BG Top Idiot
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
 
 
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
 

Advertisement:

 
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
 
 
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
 
ANTM Minicap
Thursday, 22 September 2011

America's Next Top Model

Last night on ANTM, the show awkwardly starts and for the first five minutes, it seems like I missed the opening, but what I think happened is that the editors don't give a tiny goat shit pellet about this show anymore.

Tyra shows up in at the model house sporting her newsboy finest with a global branding expert named Martin in tow.  I hate him already because I am pre-emptively blaming him for why the Kardashians are still a thing.  I myself may be to blame because I keep buying the stupid tabloids with them all over the cover.  It's a vicious cycle.

Anyway, everyone keeps saying branding and it would be awesome in the course of Martin's teachings, he whipped out a fiery hot poker and branded each girl with ANTM on their non-existent ass cheeks leaving a scar like those totally hard core fraternities do.  Also, guys, Lisa is busted.

Martin assigns each girl a "brand", which..how many personas per cycle can a girl be assigned? And if we're going to label them, why can't we just slap "vapid" across all their foreheads and wrap this shit up in fifteen minutes?  I've got my favorite gays on Modern Family to tend to.  Martin discusses with Never Nude about how she was a virgin the first time around on ANTM.  Who wants to bet that the lady who is fine with wearing bikini bottoms but not lace granny panties was the type of virgin who knew her way around a hummer?

Guys, Ashlee Simpson is here and ready to oversee makeovers.  Seriously.  Ashlee Simpson.  The girl who looks like a reject from an Avril Lavigne fashion show, which that in itself would be so awesome and pathetic at the same time if it were true.   Adding to Ashlee's ridiculousness is the fact that she dated Ryan "I fake dated Audrina to get on The Hills" Cabrera and still bitch fights with Michelle Trachtenberg over Pete "I wear more eyeliner than Taylor Momsen" Wentz.  I don't like her.  Anyway, her input is useless as expected and the last time I even remember liking this wench was when she was busy trying to devirginize Simon Camden.

So as expected, girls that had an inkling of fame think that their hair is "THE HAIR THAT SHALL REMAINED UNTOUCHED" and cry, scream, threaten to quit, etc.  Newsflash assholes: quitting a show that will give you more exposure than you've had in four score and seven years ago immediately after your head has been shaved into a mohawk is probably not a good call.  At least quit at the end after you've learned all the professional styling tips.

At the shoot, the girls are tasked with making a hotdog from Pinks with the idea of their brand in mind and then pose with the hot dog while exuding their brand.  Yes, it was as stupid as it sounds but I love a ballpark dog myself.  Continued drama ensues with hair, etc and its getting old fast.  Models?  Get another a job if you want full control of your hair or the clothing you do or do not wear.  Check back in a few days for the full recap and to see who gets sent back to Z-list famedom.


>

source: http://www.tvgasm.com/recaps/antm-minicap-4/

 

Add comment

Security code
Refresh

< Prev   Next >
Charlize Theron Covers Madison June 2012

She has two blockbuster films set to debut next month and, to help with the promotions, Charlize Theron graces the cover of the June 2012 issue of Madison magazine.The 36-year-old South African actr [ ... ]


Jennifer Aniston Gets Gorgeous For SmartWater

Appearing chic and natural, Jennifer Aniston once again appears in two SmartWater ads that are set to release in the June issues of various magazines.The ads feature the 43-year-old actress looking a [ ... ]


Elle Fanning Dances Up A Sweat

After working up a sweat, Elle Fanning was spotted leaving a dance studio in Los Angeles, California on Tuesday (May 15).Carrying a water bottle and her cell phone, the "We Bought A Zoo" actress made [ ... ]


ABC Announces Fall 2012-2013 Lineup

It’s going to be an exciting time in television this fall, as the ABC network has unveiled some fabulous new shows on deck for their primetime schedule.In the months ahead, shows like “666 Park Av [ ... ]


Vanessa Hudgens' Morning Fitness with Mom

Doing her best to stay in tip-top physical condition, Vanessa Hudgens was spotted heading to the gym for an early workout in Los Angeles, California on Tuesday (May 15).The former "High School Musica [ ... ]


The actor who printed his life on a business card

Thomas F Wilson, who played Biff Tannen in the Back to the Future movies, has a unique way of dealing with over-curious fansThe internet is awash with an image of a card that actor Thomas F Wilson pur [ ... ]


The reality of gender surgery

After a consultation with her gender reassignment surgeon, the reality of impending surgery dawns on Juliet Jacques. Is she doing the right thing?I'm finally moving towards the second major stage of t [ ... ]


The celebrity wig-wearing trend has to be good news

If Adele, Beyoncé, Lady Gaga and Nicki Minaj are proud to talk about their wigs, there's hope for those of us with bad hairWigs seem to have gone mainstream. How? And why?Orla McGarry, BelfastAs ever [ ... ]


Most popular baby names

Was your baby's name inspired by a Kardashian, a Twilight werewolf or the reality TV show Glam Fairy? You're not aloneDepending on your view of the world, the name Jacob either makes you think of the  [ ... ]


Has Nellie got talent?

Inspired by the success of Ashleigh and Pudsey, I tried to teach Nellie some new tricks …The triumph of Ashleigh and Pudsey in the Britain's Got Talent final has already got pet-owners across the na [ ... ]


Yoga for all ages

Yoga can help fight stiffness, hardening of the arteries, hormonal fluctuations, depression and loss of bone density. And, says Josephine Fairley, you can start at any ageLooking at the famous photogr [ ... ]


Maria Menounos' Perfect Night on 'DWTS'

A grinning Maria Menounos had reason to celebrate on Monday night’s (April 30) episode of “Dancing with the Stars” - as she and partner Derek Hough received a perfect score.They are the first  [ ... ]


2012 MTV Movie Awards Nominees: Complete List

Ready to pass out another batch of golden popcorn trophies, the nominees for the 2012 MTV Movie Awards were unveiled on Monday evening (April 30).With the show being held at the Gibson Amphitheater i [ ... ]


Jennifer Hudson's Sister's 911 Call Released

It's been one week since the murder trial for Jennifer Hudson's three family members got underway and, on Monday (April 30), the judge released the emotional 911 call from the "Dreamgirls" star's sis [ ... ]


Jennifer Lopez Announces Summer Tour, Gets Sued

Coming as music to her adoring fans' ears, Jennifer Lopez took center stage at Boulevard3 in Hollywood, California to make a big announcement on Monday afternoon (April 30).Looking dashing in a peach [ ... ]


Kardashian Sisters Glam Up E!'s 2012 Upfront

Helping to unveil the new look of the network that made them household names, the Kardashian sisters along with their momager, Kris Jenner, attended the E! 2012 Upfront on Monday (April 30).Before hea [ ... ]


Fashion for the over-65s

'Debo' has sartorial wisdom to share – however old you areI am a 65-year-old woman. Where on the high street should I be buying my clothes?Margaret, BristolI'm going to let you in on a little secret [ ... ]


Domestic goddess wanted: who's going to be the next Nigella Lawson?

Once, Nigella ruled. Now there's a battle for her domestic goddess crown – and style is just as important as the ability to whip up a crème brûlée. Meet the contenders…Rachel KhooStyle From her [ ... ]


Beyoncé's earth mother image shows fake authenticity at work | Bim Adewunmi

The 'natural beauty' Beyoncé has taken to Twitter and Tumblr to show us how normal she looks, but that's no bad thingBeyoncé is the most beautiful woman in the world – People magazine told me so.  [ ... ]


Miley Cyrus Undergoes Stitch Removal Procedure

Looking as if she's all healed up following her blender incident, Miley Cyrus paid a visit to a local Burbank, CA hospital for a doctor's appointment on Thursday (April 26).Accompanied by her mother, [ ... ]


Scarlett Johansson Talks 'The Avengers' Her Catsuit Physique

Though she always looks flawless in every outfit we see her in, Scarlett Johansson explained that she's just like every other woman when it comes to body insecurities.In an interview with ITV1's Dayb [ ... ]


Blake Lively's “Hick” Red Band Trailer: Watch Now!

With just over two weeks left until its theatrical release is upon us, Phase 4 Films has debuted the red band trailer for the upcoming film titled "Hick".Released via Yahoo! Movies, the two and a half [ ... ]


Prince William Kate Middleton's Imperial War Museum Evening

Capping off a full day in the spotlight, Prince William and Kate Middleton made their grand arrival at the Imperial War Museum in London, England on Thursday evening (April 26).With the Duchess of C [ ... ]


Jennifer Aniston: I Don’t Care About Brangelina Engagement

It has been seven years since she split from Brad Pitt, and Jennifer Aniston doesn’t particularly care that her ex popped the question to Angelina Jolie.The “Friends” actress, who is in a lov [ ... ]


 
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot
  EuroRANK
All Rights Reserved 2006-2012 © Designed by: europerank
 
BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot BG Top Idiot